Written by Jai McClean, former foster youth & foster care advocate

Are you tired of residue from your past spilling into your future and establishing residency there? I know I am. I noticed a clear pattern with the women in my family. My grandmother has 1 view about men. She believes ALL men cheat, lie and take advantage of women. My mother has 1 view about men. She believes ALL men cheat, lie and take advantage of women.I have 1 view about men. I believe all men ch—… wait. Something isn’t right. No one verbally communicated this projection about men to me. But, where are these toxic thoughts about men coming from? Why am I so guarded with men who are genuinely trying to be nice? A generational curse that showed up in my mother and grandmother has attached itself to me.


You may have identified some patterns that have shown up throughout your family lineage as well. Perhaps these may also be generational curses. What if I told you that these curses can be broken… for good! What if I told you that the destiny of your children are connected to you breaking these generational curses. You and I have some things to confront and have some tough decisions to make. 

Once you and I heal through any trauma and evict any bad habits or behavior that resulted from unhealed wounds, we will be able to live a life of freedom. It is important that we break the generational curses in our life, heal our wounds, adopt a new perspective and position ourselves for abundance. 

“Well Jai, I hear you. But, I am not my parents nor am I going to allow my past to define my future.”

That sounds good! Let’s be honest with ourselves. This is just not realistic if we don’t do the work! I wasn’t able to identify those generational curses in my life until I went into foster care. In many ways, foster care saved my life! It took me outside of my life for just enough time for me to identify the generational curses that were attached to my life. Along with this, I received the love needed to fill the void of abandonment I felt throughout my childhood.

You see, my foster mom took one look at me and said, “I don’t know you but I love you. I will call you my God child because you are heaven sent.”

This is where those curses began to fall off of my life. It was the power of unconditional love that severed the chains binding me to depression, suicidal thoughts and bitterness.

Wherever you are in this season, choose to identify unhealthy patterns in your life, choose healing and forgiveness every single day and choose to receive the unconditional love that you are so worthy of receiving!

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